Marriage has never been about children, children are not the reason for marriage. If children were the reason, all marriages will bear children and singles who have sex before marriage will never get pregnant. Marriage is all about partnership, a partnership between the male and female. To be able to help each other, benefit from each other, share with it each other and grow together.
There are things the male cannot do alone and there are things the female cannot achieve alone, but through their partnership, they are able to do that. Children are a product of such partnership, if you are married and you have not been blessed with that, it does not make the partnership a bad one. There many other benefits.
It is very wrong for a male and female to get marriage because of children, when children are not the reason for marriage. It means what will holds that marriage is children, the absence of children is the end of such the marriage.
It also means the most important thing to this couple is children. Such spouses care about their children but ignore their partner. Such spouses appreciate their children but downgrade their partner.
Such spouses put their children first but put their partner last. What is keeping their marriage is the children and that is the reason why they got married in the first place. Each spouse uses the least opportunity to show to the children they are better and their partner is the problem. These spouses give their best to the children but the least to their partner.
And if they get to a point where they cannot live under the same roof with their partner and have to divorce or go their separate ways, they think of punishing the other by taking custody of the children, this happens especially with the men.
The man, if it is the case, takes the children by forced means from the woman without considering the needs of the child, just because they want to punish the partner or prevent the children from seeing their mother. They try to cut off all sorts of contacts. On the other hand if the man cannot have the children, he will decide to wash his hands off them, ignore his responsibilities and only resume when forced or pushed to.
If the children end up with a bitter mother, she is always painting horrible pictures of how bad their father is. These children grow up with hatred for their fathers. These children grown up with lots of drama, filled with negatives, they struggle all alone and many end up repeating what their parents did. At the marriage ceremonies of some of these children it is a battle between their parents.
Take time to know people before you accept to be in a relationship with them. Don't start having sex with people you are not married to if you don't want to be a single parent; if you can do that, you won't be forced to marry someone because you had a child with them.
Marriage is not about children, don't let anyone rent space in your life because you had sex with them, do that because they are a good spouse and because you are married to them.
In conclusion "Children are a blessing and a gift from the Lord" - Psalm 127:3 (CEV).
Please share with your friends, someone out there needs this.
Thank you for reading. This has been your Counselor and Motivator.
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