EBONY'S FATHER NEEDS HEALING NOT ATTENTION

I am not a fan of the late Ebony, neither am I a friend of her manager, Ricky Nana Agyeman popularly known as Bullet. I also don't have issues with her parents and that is what makes this article a neutral one as a position of a counselor. I will urge anyone reading this to get to the last word before passing any comment. Emotional discretion is advised.

1 Thessalonians 5:18 (TLB) says "No matter what happens, always be thankful, for this is God's will for you who belong to Christ Jesus". As much as the demise of the young artiste is painful, what we owe God is thanksgiving and not these unnecessary punches, public sympathy, attention seeking.

Telling Bullet it was too early to introduce his new artist on stage during the VGMA is like someone telling you, it is too early to eat after the death of Ebony. Even in tears we try hard to eat, for it is our heart that is sad but our stomachs are not and need to be attended to.

Introducing this new artist does not mean he has replaced or was replacing Ebony. Bullet can never replace Ebony, she is a star, she is unique, and she shines even in darkness; even in her death.

These ladies are not stars yet and have not achieved what your daughter has. These ladies' achievement can add to Ruff Town Records label but can never erase or replace Ebony's achievement or legacy. It lives on even in death.

New songs from these new artists won't replace the lyrics of Ebony's song in the mind of the public. It won't prevent the public from playing or singing her songs.

Again, the relationship between Ebony and Bullet is not wife and husband but artist and her management. Our custom tradition sets out period to mourn ones spouse and are not allowed to get a new spouse within that period. This case is different from that so lets us not get it twisted.

Bullet is a business man. Before Ebony, he was into business and after Ebony, he will still be in business. It is our nature as man not to be idle. Even when you look at babies and they are growing up, they are always busy, the only time they get tired is when they are sleeping.

Man is to work, the only time we are tired is when we are resting. As much as he has mourned his beloved artiste, man must eat, man must rebuild. If there is anyone who has lost much, I believe he is the one. He might not have met the lady for long, but has invested so much into her. His time, passion, money, dreams, etc. The lady's death is one of his biggest loss and not his biggest gain.

Apart from God, who gave her as a gift to you as parents, the next big things that happened to Ebony when she was alive was her meeting with Bullet her manager. Bullet didn't just see a star in her but helped her to become a star. If we are talking about loss today, Mr. Nana Poku Kwarteng lost his beloved daughter, Bullet lost his biggest star or artist so far.

The introduction of a new artist shouldn't cause Mr. Kwarteng to feel bitter or bad. He should get over his loss or seek professional help. Conflict is part of every relationship, no matter how he loved and cared for his daughter, he had had issues with her on a couple of occasion, he has also hurt his daughter before.

If he is to count all the good and the bad he did to his daughter, I believe the good will out weight the bad, therefore he is a good father. In the same way Bullet might have offended her, conflict is part of relationships, so I believe Bullet and Ebony might offend each other on some occasions. If Bullet is to count the good and the bad, the good will out weight the bad, therefore bullet is a good man and a good manager.

As human as we are, no one can be good at all times, but we can always be good with time, because as we grow, we learn from our mistakes, that is how we become better.

Trying to look for the wrong that Bullet did your daughter or point out his mistakes or flaws by closing eyes to the good is to say, you want to paint him as a bad person, something we should not encourage.

Mr. Kwarteng's hurt or grief will not bring back his daughter. I will urge him to seek healing rather than inflicting pains and wounds on others because he is wounded or in pain. Playing the game of Perfect Dad does not make you real.

Let's all remember we are spirits in human flesh or form, mistakes are part of our story. We are not angels, one thing we can all do is learn from our mistakes and become better people.

I am not trying to be an insensitive person, I share your pain and grief, I know how it feels to lose a loved one, more especially I know the anger associated with losing a dear daughter for I have lost two.

It is a lie to believe men don't cry. Men are human beings; they can't be strong all the time. In times like this, it is okay to be alone and let out your tears, the pain, anger and bitterness. Forgive whoever you think has hurt you, by so doing you embrace the peace your heart needs.

Please share with your friends, someone out there needs this.

Thank you for reading. This has been your Counselor and Motivator.

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