We should learn to love our spouses, no matter how unloving they have become, because God never stopped loving us when we became unloving and disrespectful towards Him. We need to forgive our spouses when they hurt us, for we were first forgiven by God. As His children He is teaching us to live our lives like Him.
The goal of every loving father is to see his children to be like him or better, not worse. Gods want the best from us because He first gave us His best. And He never gives up on us. He has hope even for the worst sinner.
When we love something, even in its worst stage, we still have hope for it, we don't abandon it. This is one thing that makes the burial of a loved one so hard. Even though their bodies have gone bad and nothing can be done to bring it back to life, we find it difficult to dispose it off.
We end up giving them a befitting burial, a tomb, where we can always go, as if that will re-established the broken connection. If we truly love our spouse as we claim, letting them go will be the hardest decision of our lives.
Strangely, hurting or unhappy spouses cannot wait to leave their marriage. Many couldn't wait to divorce but go ahead in a hurry to take off the ring from their fingers. Forgetting that taking the ring off doesn't mean you are no more married. God doesn't need a ring to know whether you are married or not. The vow you made to and before Him is what He knows.
Since He is a covenant keeping God, He holds on to vows made to Him. People don’t know you don't marry for happiness; you marry to fulfil the purpose of God. And the reason why you are not happy in your marriage is because you don't appreciate the spouse God has blessed you with.
Whenever you look at your spouse, all you see is the negatives, the hurt, their weakness. Meanwhile God doesn't see us like that. Even in our sinful nature, God still sees us as His image and because He loves Himself, He continues to love us despite our iniquities.
Issues in your marriage should not be the reasons to give up, it should be the motivation to work on your marriage; not an excuse to back out but an inspiration to carry on.
Let your love for your spouse go beyond the physical, let it be spiritual, pray for your spouse and address them like the man or woman you want them to become.
Don't make a permanent decision because your spouse upset you. You should rather seek the face of God. Ask God what to do. Lean on Him, not on your emotion but on His understanding. His plans for your life are bigger than your hurt and frustration.
God has the bigger picture of your marriage; don't just conclude on what you see through the windows of your marriage, for bad weather always looks worse through a window.
Your commitment to love your spouse should be unconditional even in a bad situation, being willing to serve them selflessly, communicate, protect, forgive them. This has the power to heal and restore your marriage.
In conclusion, no matter how hurt, tired or weak you are from your marital journey, seek the face of God. "He gives power to the tired and worn out, and strength to the weak" - Isaiah 40:29 (TLB).
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