Reasons for Marriage

There are many reasons and motivating factors for marriage. What are yours? Have you ever thought about them? Respond
to the following and discuss your answers with your fiance.

1. What will you receive out of marriage that you wouldn’t
receive by remaining single?

2. On a separate piece of paper, list the reasons why you are
marrying your fiance. After you have done that, list the
reasons why you think your fiance is marrying you. Then
share the results.

Now compare your reasons for marriage with the following
list, which has been compiled by several specialists in marriage
and family life education.

These are unhealthy reasons for
marriage! If you find that any of these appear either on your list
or in your own mind, you should spend time discussing them
with your fiance and your minister.

1. To spite or get back at your parents.

2. Because of a negative self-image—marrying your fiance
will make you feel worthwhile and will give meaning to your
life.

3. To be a therapist or counselor to your fiance.

4. Fear of being left out! Being left as a bachelor or an old
maid!

5. Fear of independence.

6. Marrying on the rebound—you were hurt in a former
love relationship and to ease your hurt you immediately
choose another.

7. Fear of hurting the other person—you’re afraid of what
will happen to your fiance if you break up even though you
know that marriage is not the answer.

8. To escape an unhappy home.

9. Because you are pregnant or your fiance is pregnant.

10. Because you have had sex.

A few of the positive reasons for marriage:

1. Companionship.

2. To work together and fulfill your own and your future
mate’s needs.

3. To fulfillsexual needs in the way God intends.

4. Love (an adequate blending of the various types of love,
as explained in Chapter 3).

5. Because you are convinced that it is God’s will for you to marry this person.

Evaluate your “marriageability” by examining the personality
traits of yourself and your fiance. List eight character or
personality traits that you feel would help a marriage.

Turn in your Bible to Galatians 5:22,23 and read over the fruit
of the Spirit. Would these traits, manifested in a person,
increase the potential of success in marriage? If so, indicate
which of these you manifest and which of themyou are still
having difficulty displaying.
In addition to using the fruit of the Spirit as a guide for
evaluating the potentialsuccess of a marriage, consider these
eight marriageability traits that give a person a greater
possibility of having an enriched and satisfying marriage: 1.
Adaptability and flexibility—the ability to change and adapt.

Share: